Chapter 29

The playoffs were a strange experience for me. The only sporting event I ever watched previous to meeting Sidney was the Superbowl, so I wasn’t sure what to expect. When I stepped foot inside the rink for the first home game I was blown away. It was loud from the minute the doors opened until the final buzzer. It felt like the Superbowl, only it was just the first round.

I couldn’t help but get excited every time I made my way into the rink. I already had a reason to care about the outcome of the games with Sidney on the ice. Even so, just being in that atmosphere made it that much more exciting. My stomach churned every play, and every hit Sid took made me wince. The games were way more intense than I was expecting.

Things with Sidney off the ice were a little strange too. I’d gotten used to knowing what his game days consisted of, but now they were magnified. He was a different person even. I knew he had a lot of pressure on him, and I didn’t want to add to that. I did the only thing I could think of to do and told him to just worry about himself. He didn’t like that so much, but he knew he wasn’t going to change my mind.

He wasn’t around as much in the week before the playoffs started, and hardly at all once they had. I wasn’t bitter or upset, I understood. I filled up my days spending time with the girls in the last month we’d ever be living together. That too was a very strange feeling.

Each away game was spent at a new girl’s house. We all got together and watched the games as a group acting as both a distraction and a support system. We all knew the importance of every game and it felt like we were all on the ice with the guys. Every goal scored against the Pens crushed us, and every goal the Pens scored elated us.

After the Penguins won the first round over Philly I wasn’t sure that I could take much more of the playoffs. Football was much easier to deal with. One game against each team until the final two were standing. Even then it seemed more like a party and an excuse to hang out than a championship.

I forced myself to go to every home game the Pens had. It didn’t matter how I felt. I just knew I’d never forgive myself if I missed something. After each game I avoided the subject of the game unless Sidney brought it up. Not being an expert at hockey I didn’t feel it was my place to talk about the game unless he wanted to. More often than not he didn’t. It was funny how things worked out. His games were my escape from feeling sick, but I was Sidney’s escape from the game.

It was hard not to keep the smile off my face and the giggles quiet as Sidney’s “playoff beard” grew in. I’d been warned that almost all of the guys across the league would stop shaving for the playoffs. I’d also been warned how bad Sidney’s facial hair was the year before. As the second round against the Capitals started, it began to fill in. Sort of.

They left for Washington the day before game 1. I smiled and gave Sidney a kiss before he left for the airport, trying not to let on how stressed I was about this series. I wanted them to demolish the Caps, and I wanted Sid to outplay Ovechkin more than anything.

All I could think about when I heard the name Ovechkin was the day the Caps were in Pittsburgh and I was walking to the wives room early for a game. A few of the Capitals were playing soccer in the area right in front of the room. Thankfully I looked over at the group as I was passing to get to the room. If I hadn’t I wouldn’t have seen Ovechkin kick the soccer ball that missed my head by about a foot, thanks to my quick ducking reaction. While his teammates looked embarrassed and apologetic, he simply laughed. He laughed so hard he couldn’t breathe. Asshole.

It was our turn to host the girls for game 1. I hadn’t been feeling great that day and spent most of it curled up in bed. When Sid scored the first goal I smiled for the first time. Unfortunately the smile didn’t last long as the Pens lost, and Ovechkin had a goal.

Vero was hosting the second game so Grace, Hailey, and I headed over. The game started off well with Sidney scoring, but once again I watched in anger as Ovechkin scored a hat trick. But then with about 30 seconds left, Sidney had a hat trick of his own. It may not have meant as much since the Pens lost again and went down 2-0 in the series, but I was proud of him.

“Are you ready to go?” Grace asked me after the game ended.

“Actually, do you think you could drop me off at the Lemieux’s?”

“Of course,” she replied.

I got into her car and called Nathalie on the way. She told me she had no problem with me coming over. Grace dropped me off and Nathalie met me at the door. I sat with her for a little bit before heading up to Sidney’s room and getting into bed. I wasn’t sure that I was doing the right thing by being there when he got home that night, but I felt like I had to do something. Almost as soon as my head hit the pillow, I fell asleep.










Sidney got on the plane and slipped on his headphones. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone tonight. Most of the guys seemed to feel the same way. Sidney had never heard the plane so quiet. As he stared out the window he thought about the game. He should be happy about his first playoff hat trick, but he wasn’t. They’d lost and were down 2-0 in the series. He was pissed.

It was going to take a lot of work to come back on Washington and he was already going over what he needed to work on for the next game. The plane ride went quickly as he thought about game 3. There was no way around it. They needed to win in order to have a chance to move on to the next round.

He got into his car and checked his phone. He’d called Tanner before they’d taken off but she hadn’t picked up. He figured she must not have been feeling well and was in bed. Seeing that he didn’t have any messages from her only confirmed what he thought.

He pulled up to the house and went straight to his wing. He was tired, so he just left his bags in his living room and started towards his room. He paused at the door when he heard a sound. It sounded like someone or something moving in his bed. He reached for a hockey stick leaning against the wall as his eyes strained against the darkness to see what was there.

He heard the breathing before he saw the shape. Someone was definitely in there. As his eyes adjusted he could see someone lying in bed. He let go of the stick as he realized it was Tanner, and she was definitely asleep. He sighed as his racing heartbeat began to return to normal.
He quietly made his way into the room and into his closet to change, without turning on any lights. He didn’t want to wake her. He changed out of his suit and put everything back in its place by memory. As he made his way towards his bed he realized he had a slight smile on his face.

As he looked down at Tanner’s sleeping form he knew his life had completely changed. Every other time he’d been as upset about a game as he had been tonight he wanted to just go home and be alone. When he was alone he could go over things in his head. He just liked dealing with it his own way without having to worry about anyone else. He hated the “it’s okay, you’ll get them next time” pep talks people always wanted to give you.

Now as he looked down at Tanner, he was grateful that she was there. He hadn’t realized how much he’d wanted to be around her until he saw her. Confident that he hadn’t woken her he reached for the sheets to pull them back so he could get into bed and cuddle up to her. He was mistaken.

“I hope it’s okay that I’m here. I was just really tired all day and your bed is so much more comfortable than mine,” she said.

His eyes had adjusted to the darkness completely at this point and he saw a small smile form on her face. He felt his smile grow as well. She hadn’t mentioned the game at all. She had even made it seem as if she was there for better sleep instead of being there for him after a tough couple of games. It was exactly what he needed.

“It’s definitely okay. I’m glad you’re here,” he told her.

This time he did pull back the sheets. As he got into bed he felt something small that was definitely not Tanner. He reached down to pull up whatever the object was. For a minute he was confused as he looked at a hat. What the hell would one of his hats be doing in bed? Then it hit him. It was for his hat trick. He tossed it to the floor and looked over at Tanner. Her eyes were closed, but she was definitely smirking.

“Thank you,” he whispered as he wrapped his arms around her. She kissed him in response. She was asleep a minute later and he placed a kiss on her cheek before falling asleep himself.